diff --git a/.gitignore b/.gitignore
index 4129f9d..e85ebed 100644
--- a/.gitignore
+++ b/.gitignore
@@ -1,2 +1,3 @@
 /bot_config.yaml
+/.ignore
 
diff --git a/commands.rb b/commands.rb
index f5b71b1..a2f54a9 100644
--- a/commands.rb
+++ b/commands.rb
@@ -73,7 +73,7 @@ def process_command_srvstatus(message, command, adm)
         telnet = @conf['telnet']
         print 'Checking connectivity to Empyrion service... '
         STDOUT.flush
-        if `nc -zvw3 #{telnet['host']} #{telnet['port']} >/dev/null 2>&1`
+        if system("nc -zvw3 #{telnet['host']} #{telnet['port']} >/dev/null 2>&1")
             print "Server responded!\nSending message receipt... "
             STDOUT.flush
             if `./scripts/srvstatus.receipt #{@conf['token']} #{message.chat.id}`
@@ -81,11 +81,12 @@ def process_command_srvstatus(message, command, adm)
             else
                 print "Receipt FAILED to send (non-zero exit code on scripts/srvstatus.receipt) !!!\nContinuing to fetch details anyway...\n"
             end
+            reply = `./scripts/srvstatus #{telnet['host']} #{telnet['port']} #{telnet['pass']}`
         else
-            print "Server did not respond! Passing to scripts/srvstatus for sending the failure message (revisit this for code efficiency review\n)"
+            print "Server did not respond!\nSending failure message...\n"
+            reply = "Server is not responding!"
         end
         STDOUT.flush
-        reply = `./scripts/srvstatus #{telnet['host']} #{telnet['port']} #{telnet['pass']}`
     else
         reply = "Refusal: I am not authorized to provide this information here."
     end
diff --git a/patchnotes.txt b/patchnotes.txt
index 50e56a8..3ad3896 100644
--- a/patchnotes.txt
+++ b/patchnotes.txt
@@ -1,10 +1,16 @@
 SkyfallTech EGS Telebot
 Patch Notes:
 
+v0.3.03
++ Fixed 'server is up oops nevermind' condition in /status.
++ Fixed /whoami output formatting.
++ Fixed /whereareyou command.
+--- (previously relied on a now-broken Contegix service)
+
 v0.3.02
-+ Better server logs, round 2
++ Better server logs, round 2.
 + Less ambiguous patchnotes listing
-  (These are for the bot, not for Empyrion)
+--- (These are for the bot, not for Empyrion)
 
 v0.3.01
 + Better server logs, round 1.
diff --git a/run.rb b/run.rb
index 9538d6b..8148660 100755
--- a/run.rb
+++ b/run.rb
@@ -100,9 +100,9 @@ def handle_message(message)
     case command
         when '/start'
             reply = "Introduction: I am #{@botname}, and I am here to make life easier for meatbag admins like you. Currently I can retrieve information " +
-                    "from an Empyrion server as well as kill the server process.\n\n" +
-                    "Commands available:\n/start (Shows this message)\n/srvstart (Probably won't work)\n/srvstop\n/status\n/whoami\n\n" +
-                    "Check again later to see if any new functions have been added."
+                    "from an Empyrion server as well as kill the server process. I also have some pretty sweet dance moves.\n\n" +
+                    "Commands available:\n/start (Shows this message)\n/srvstart (Currently non-functional)\n/srvstop\n/status\n/whoami or /chatinfo\n/whereareyou or /location\n\n" +
+                    "Check again later to see if any new functions have been added, or use /patchnotes to learn about recent updates."
             if ! message_from_admin?(message, adm) && ! is_chat_authorized?(message, @auth_chat)
                 if message.from.id == message.chat.id
                     reply = reply + "\n\nWARNING: I am not authorized to work you directly. My functionality is limited."
@@ -127,13 +127,13 @@ def handle_message(message)
             reply = process_command_patchnotes(message, command, adm)
         when '/location', '/whereareyou'
             if message_from_admin?(message, adm) || is_chat_authorized?(message, @auth_chat)
-                reply = "I am currently located at:\n\nHost: #{`head -n1 /etc/hostname`}ExtIP: #{`curl myip.contegix.com 2>/dev/null`}"
+                reply = "I am currently located at:\n\nHost: #{`head -n1 /etc/hostname`}ExtIP: #{`curl icanhazip.com 2>/dev/null`}"
             else
                 reply = "Refusal: I am not authorized to provide this information here."
             end
         when '/whoami', '/chatinfo'
             #reply = "Answer:  You are a meatbag named #{message.from.username}\n\nUser ID:  #{message.from.id}\n\nChat ID: #{message.chat.id}"
-            reply = "User ID:  #{message.from.id}\nChat ID: #{message.chat.id}"
+            reply = "User ID: #{message.from.id}\nChat ID: #{message.chat.id}"
             if command == '/whoami'
                 reply = "Answer:  You are a meatbag named #{message.from.username}\n\n" + reply
             end